February 27, 2010

Things I've Learned From Pro Wrestling

"I've seen an old man have a heart attack in Manhattan.
Well he died while we just stood there lookin' at him." 
"USA! USA!"
I'm not from America. I was born and raised in Canada (Olympic Vancouver land). For the sake of this feature I will be referring to Americans as "we" and "us". If there is anything I've learned from wrestling it's that deep down, we are all Americans at heart or want to be. Fans from all over the world know you chant "USA! USA!" for the good guys. America is the greatest country in the world because of it's freedom.
Hulk Hogan: "Real Americans"
Hulk Hogan is a real American. He fights for the rights of everyone. You know this by the time he walks to the ring cause his handy them music tells you so. He bleaches his hair and handlebar mustache blond, hides his balding under a "cool," bandanna and has an intense orange tan. He calls everyone "dude," "man" or "brother"and espouses the religion of Hulkamania, a philosophy based on the awesomeness of his own self. Through training hard, saying your prayers, eating vitamins and wearing of the sacred canary yellow and red you shall receive enlightenment.  
Hulk hogan calls his enormous arms pythons, or sometimes guns. His muscley-ness is100% natural from eating shit-tons of vitamins and pumping iron on Venice Beach with his buddy Sting spotting him. He doesn't use steroids because that is cheating and cheating is not American. Hulk Hogan has never even seen a steroid. If you showed Hulk Hogan a steroid, he'd say "I have no idea what I'm supposed to be looking at, brother."
http://www.sandpapersuit.com/uploaded_images/MrFuji008.jpg
Mr. Fuji: "Asians"
Most Asians are sneaky and devious as typified by Mr. Fuji.
They are small and squint a lot but make up for their lack of size and ripped pythons with their innate understanding of the deadly art of karate. If an Asian person kicks you in the windpipe it can fuck your throat up real bad. They wear pajamas and sometimes eat raw fish. Japanese people call themselves "san". Like Mr. Fuji-san" and say "Banzai" when they are about to attack you and throw salt in your eyes when you're not looking.
This is called "Pearl Harboring" someone. Then you have to go "Hiroshima," and "Nagasaki," their asses.
There are no Chinese wrestlers, at least not that anyone knows about, because they are nearly impossible to tell apart from Japanese people. It is good form to simply say they are from "Asia" or "The Orient".
Hillbilly Jim: "Hicks"
The hick is the redneck's benevolent cousin. Hicks can be identified by their overalls, which they always wear into the ring, and the livestock they take with them everywhere they go. They are strong as bulls from lifting bails of hay, scooping up large turds and milking things all day.
Hilarity often ensues when hicks come to the big city to "rassle," and things play out Beverly Hillbillies style.
Sample interview:
"Hillbilly Jim! This locker room is a pig sty! Literally!"
"Well Mean Gene, I brought my favorite heifer Clara-Bell to the Joe Louis Arena tonight to watch me and the Hulkster hog-tie that no good Mr. Fuji and that dang Iron Sheik and then we're gonna have us a hoe down!" Cue annoying banjo music.
Kamala: "Ugandans"
Kamala is from the deepest, darkest jungles of Africa. He is a savage bush person, which means he is almost retarded. He enjoys slapping his fat belly and eating disgusting things. Kamala is so stupid that he needs a handler to lead him back and forth from the ring without eating anyone. He often forgets to roll a person over onto their back before pinning them. He has at various times in his career, licked his opponents blood off of his fingers and also referenced (through an interpreter) putting his opponents in a big pot and boiling them. All jungle people can, as I have learned from Bugs Bunny, manage to find at least one over-sized pot big enough to cook someone in.

More Olympics Bullshit.

"You got the beer, we got the time. You got the coke, gimme a line." 
"Muk Muk Runs Amuck!"
Mere days after Quatchi's arrest, VANOC  faces another PR disaster. Olympic mascot Muk Muk renounced his ties with the IOC and allied with black bloc protesters as they knocked over newspaper boxes and smashed department store windows. His only statement to the media was a loud refrain of 
"No justice, no peace, Muk the police!"
"Hockey! Finland! Yay!"
I got the opportunity to attend my first Olympic event today, taking some stoked downtown eastside residents to the women's bronze medal hockey between Finland and Sweden.
We adopted Finland as our team and the folks from our women's housing project, seated right behind us adopted Sweden. It was nice to see people who normally wouldn't be able to attend an Olympic event standing on their feet screamed "C'mon Sweden! For fucks sake! Shoot the puck you stupid idiots!"

Observations;
- Finland killed them on defense and had a scrappier team. At one point a Finn forward broke through four defenders and shot the puck across her body, past the goalie. Amazing. It ended in overtime 3-2 for the good guys. Finland uber alles!
- A special medal should be given to whoever was operating the PA at GM Place (or Canada Hockey Place as they're calling it. Playing everything from Joan Jett to the Pretenders to The Go-Gos, the Donnas, The Breeders, Heart (Barracuda) and any other "chick rock" anthem they could muster as well as the obligatory ABBA tune for any Swedish meatballs in the audience.

-There was an incredible amount of skill in the game and it was chippier than I expected, with the Finn goalie, delivering several punches and a nice face-wash to opposing players who crashed the crease.
-I found out why none fo the checks were finished when one of the players got a penalty for "body-checking". In the game of hockey, that's the equivalent of getting 2 minutes for "skating".
- In women's hockey you get a penalty for "too many players" on the ice, not "too many men," but they still say "defensemen,"not "defense-people". They also, for some reason call "sudden death" overtime "sudden victory" overtime, so no one has to worry that someone will actually be killed, I suppose.
Anyway a good time was had by all.
"Sloppy Olympic Sex = Front Page News"
After a steady storm of bad publicity, shitty weather, public outcry, deaths etc and claims from around the globe early on that the Vancouver Olympics was the worst of all time, all our local media has chosen to focus on, besides the sports themselves is the amount of "spirit" and "patriotism" shown at stupid Canada Pavillion and street parties on Granville. An insightful article in local birdcage liner "24hr," entitled "damn, lookin' good," (cause hey, fuck sentences) seemed to boil the games down to it's essence - drunk people drunkenly fucking other drunk people.
Gross. Of course, like a car accident I had to look at their full gallery online.
"Hi. Mind if I rape you?"
"Hey guys! I'm between periods!"
Insert your own livestock reference here "__________________________"
Wow, you ladies look just like Hugh Hefner's creepy "Stepford-triplets" pulled through a knothole!
"New Olympic medals are uuuuug-ly."
In honor of the noble Orca, the artist who designed the Olympic medals decided to cast them in the shape of whale shit. Not a good idea.
I felt bad when listening to the artist spiel about how they painstakingly designed the medal. They look like they were made by Salvidor Dali or like someone left them sitting on the radiator and they warped.
"Carrot-Top Wins Gold"
Wisely abandoning prop comedy for the world snowboarding circuit, the freckle-faced weirdo made good for team USA. You can see him appearing nightly at the Luxor following the Blueman Group.
"Intensities In Tent-Cities"
Vancouver's poor and marginalized showed the world that they have a voice (and a lot of balls), successfully diverting the Olympic torch relay from Commercial Drive, staging an enormous protest at the opening ceremonies. Protesters then launched an assault on downtown, smashing out The Bay's windows and daring Vancouver's finest in full combat gear to do what they do best - whale on their own citizens - with the world watching.The day after the violence, the people assembled peacefully and marched 4,000 strong in a very moving tribute to the downtown eastside's missing women.
I have never been more proud of where I live . Magically, things seemed to calm down. There were fewer helicopters and fewer cops patrolling our streets. Olympic revelry stayed mainly contained in the downtown area, not the downtown eastside. As I rode the bus from Hastings and Princess to my home a dozen or so  blocks away I heard the driver said "wow, after being downtown, this looks like a ghost town." That's how we like it. Stay the fuck out and if you come into our community, show some goddamned respect.
The Olympics seems to have disappeared from the downtown eastside. It is business as usual on street corners and my favorite drunks are back one their park benches. Flags and banners are everywhere, celebrating our community.
After a tent city was erected at Hastings and Abbott there wasn't as much of a need for marches. The issues were there for all to see. People around the world came to tent city and actually had conversations with poor people about our city's lack of compassion for the homeless. This is the real "Downtown Eastside Connect." Not that bullshit, white-wash kiosk BC Housing set up at the new Woodward's abomination to celebrate the good deeds of social service agencies and how great in is that they decided to build a few more shelters. Before you stop and congratulate yourself for all the wonderful things you're doing to help the poor, maybe you should get involved in the community and encourage your clients to do the same, rather than giving them a cot to sleep on and a bar of soap and then patting yourself on the back for your generosity
Just a thought.

February 23, 2010

Rock 'n' Roll Damnation: Desmond Child

 "They saved Hitler's cock. They hid it under a rock."
You may not know the face or even recognize the name but this fruitcake is personally responsible for much of what sucked shit in the last three decades. Let's check out this resume. Desmond Child, this is your life.


Wow

- After his own band, Desmond Child and Rouge, tanked, he was recruited by Paul Stanley to help write "I Was Made For Loving You," otherwise known as KISS's disco tune. It charted high and is to this day nearly universally reviled by the dorks that consider themselves hardcore KISS fans. He went on to write tunes on Animalize, Asylum, Crazy Nights & Hot In The Shade during KISS' non-make-up poofy hair glam rock period.
- He went on to pen bubble-gum metal anthems "You Give Love A Bad Name," "Livin' On A Prayer," and "Bad Medicine," with Bon Jovi, who always have and will suck, so no biggie there.

From there "I Hate Myself For Loving You" a decent Joan Jett tune from her unspectacular "Up Your Alley".It gets worse - He co-wrote all of Alice Cooper's Trash album a giant hunk of shit, which ended up in the trash after I made the poor decision to buy it. The track "Poison" could have been written by the band Poison.
This album also prominently features Kip Winger, as a co-writer. Kip,  besides serving as a living 80's punchline, fronted the band Winger, who I have to assume were awful, since I can't think of one good reason why the fuck would I would actually bother sitting down and listening to them. Y'know? 
Then he went on to co-write "Dude Looks Like A Lady" with Aerosmith, taking brutally annoying to a completely new level schmaltzy rock ballads. ("Angel," anyone? "Crazy"? are you barfing in your own mouth yet?) That opened the flood gates for them to follow the same formula and polluted the airwaves a dozen other times, including the song from that stupid meteor movie. Thanks.
The problem I have with this guy is that he helped popularize the commercial radio friendly rock ballad, ruining a lot of decent bands directly or indirectly in the 80's and influencing countless more. The songs he writes with flat-out awful, annoying artists; "Livin' La Vida Loca" and "She Bangs" with Ricky Martin, "How Am I Supposed To Live Without You" by Michael goddamned fucking Bolton for Christ's sake by are catchy like SARS and twice as devastating. They ooze out of the speakers from a.m. radio and burrow into your eardrums, straight into your brain like that worm in "Wrath of Khan".

Other career lowlights include;
Clay Aiken, Bo Bice and Kelly Clarkson from ... that show (queasy).
Bif Naked "I Love Myself Today (barfing),
RuPaul (continuing to barf),
Roxette (barfing violently),
Boyzone (wow, that's a lotta barf), whoa ...
"The Thong Song" by Sisquo (laughing a little and starting to choke on barf).

Wow. Good job, dude. Way to whore yourself out to the absolute bottom of the sub-sub-barrel and make music that much shittier in the process.

Fuck you, Desmond. Fuck you right in the ear.

February 21, 2010

Quatchi Rape Charge Rocks 2010 Olympics!

"I came into this world like a puzzled panther."
 
2010 mascot, Quatchi was lead away in handcuffs from Vancouver's Olympic Village Sunday, charged with two counts of sexual assault.  The alleged incident took place outside of The Roxy on Granville St.  following a post-"victory ceremony," celebration. The VPD would not release any other details of the victim's allegations.
The official Olympic website says;
 "Quatchi is shy, but loves to explore new places and meet new friends." 
And also adds "Because of his large size, he can be a little clumsy. But no one can question his passion."  Muk Muk could not be reached for comment.

February 20, 2010

The Awesome Hall of Fame & The Hall of Total Bullshit

"All I wanted was a Pepsi."
Awesome Hall of Fame: Dog Halloween
I understand that this is technically animal abuse but look at the little fake dangling arms! I can hardly stand it! Sure he'll probably pay you back by taking a big dump in your shoes tomorrow morning or bite you in the face but look how cute the little shithead is right now.
Hall of Total Bullshit: Muffin Top
I don't want to contribute to anyone's negative body-image but, for everyone's sake, can you  keep your Crisco inside your pants please?
Awesome Hall of Fame: Whoever put the soap in the fountain at the Vancouver Art Gallery
Mad props.
Hall of Total Bullshit: Bike on the sidewalk
I feel much the same way about bikes on the sidewalk as I do beached whales. Both flounder awkwardly outside of their habitat. If you see someone with a bicycle on the sidewalk, do the only humane thing, help them return to their natural environment and give them a gentle push back into the road where they belong.
Awesome Hall of Fame: Rip Torn
Obviously. Found drunk? With a gun? Inside a bank? Sounds about right.
Hall of Total Bullshit: Ecstasy
Let me get this straight; I can take a pill that will keep me awake for 12 hours, sweating and grinding my teeth, that will make me dance like an asshole to bad music and really, really like people I would normally be annoyed by? I dunno ... can it make me horny and impotent at the same time? Okay, then count me in!

Awesome Hall of Fame: Summer
Fuck off Winter. Go to hell, Fall. Nice try Spring but you're just not making it for me. Picnics, beers in the park, beers on the beach. Beers anywhere pretty much. Fuck off, snow.
Hall of Total Bullshit: Waxed Mustache
Die!
Awesome Hall of Fame: Skullet
Know what's better than giving a fuck? Totally not giving a fuck!
Just because you're harshly thinning on the top doesn't mean you can't rock it out Devin Townsend style.
Party in the back ... nothing in the front!
Hall of Total Bullshit: Bouncers
I understand you are just doing you job but your job is to be a total asshole. I hope you get dick cancer.






February 11, 2010

Welcome To Vancouver - Cop-Land!

"What could a business man ever want more. Than to have us sucking in his store."




There are so many pigs in Vancouver right now it is like a nightmare come true. They are shipping them in by the bus load from places like ... Central Sandwich (?). I'm pretty sure some of these places are made up. Kawartha Lake?What the hell is that? Not actually a real place. Waddaya think of that?
Wow. Cameras everywhere, no parking . A special Olympics lane only official IOC goons can drive in and the ubiquitous white cars (or cars of various colors now) emblazoned with the Olympic Pac-Man logo. The helicoptars I hear all night long are giving me Vietnam flashbacks.


Oh, and here are some of the many cameras watching us all.
And here's some more cops!
More fucking signs.
Cops again.


Pedobear.

Get me out of here.

Olympics Mascots Bro Down With Pedobear!

"On the back of a winged horse. Through the sky pearly grey. Love is leaf-like. You and me baby."


Quatchi, Sumi, Muk Muk and the gang are in hot water after photos of them with "Pedobear," a cartoon bear created to draw attention to internet pedophilia, have surfaced out of ... you guess it - Poland!
Stay tuned as this one develops.



February 8, 2010

Hunt & Gather: 70's Rock Profile: Cactus

"I drink Coca-Cola for breakfast. I've Got Jackie Onassis in my pants."
Orang-Utan - Orang-Utan (1971)
It's always amazing to check out an album, expecting it to be some sort of obscure novelty album, and discover it's a "real" album. The vocals walk the fine line between Led Zep and Budgie and the songs are reminiscent of the latter's better mellow material. The last tune reminds me of the James Gang and hardly anyone does that. Twins guitar lead that don't harmonize or trade back and forth, they sort of overlap, like singing in a round. They manage to be impressive without drifting into excessive noodling. The songs have atmosphere, emotion and all the intangibles. This is heavy English blues rock at it's best.
Haystacks Balboa - Haystacks Balboa (1970)
There seems to be a lot of mystery surrounding this band. A bio of them on the actual CD (a bootleg, I assume) refers to them as them as an early English hard-rock band. They are from New York.
There was a rumor that Leslie West's brother Larry played guitar in this band. Larry played bass in Leslie's pre-Mountain band, The Vagrants and both Wests were supposedly friends with members of Haystacks. The big dude in the band photo, with the afro who looks like Leslie's twin is actually guitar player Mark Mayo. To confuse matters further, Larry West gets co-writing credit on one of the songs on this album.
There are also two versions of this album available. One is the self-titled 1970 release pictured above. At some point the record was re-released under the name "Detoxified," with a picture of a guy in a gas mask on the cover.
The final intriguing tidbit is that, in an interview I found their former bass player, says that members of the band (guitarist Mayo, drummer Mark Babani and keyboardist Lloyd Landesman) played in a band called Tangerine Puppets when they were in high school, in Forrest Hills New York. Tangerine Puppets was the name of the first band or Johnny and Tommy from the Ramones, also from Forrest Hills. The only problem is I can't find any mention of the Balboa members in any of the Tangerine Puppets info. As well, there is no mention of either Ramone in any of the Balboa articles mentioning Tangerine Puppets.Wow.
This is a good example of an album that I needed to hear a few more times before making a judgment. Initially I thought it was horrible. Now I'm not really sure what it is. It starts out simply enough with "The Spoiler," a straight up rocker with macho "fuck 'em and forget 'em," lyrics.
Then it takes a left turn on "The Children of Heaven," with a raspy-voiced second singer that reminds me of that song "The Crusher," ("do they eye-gouge, you turkey neck,")and weird chicken
shrieks. The songs begin to follow some confounding story-line and the music becomes very spastic and Zappa-ish. There is a strange first person narrative that goes back and forth role-playing between the devil (sounding like tom Waits) "here I come, I'm gonna burn you alive!" and then "eek! Oh no! I must escape the devil. This weirdness really kicks off at "The Auburn Queen," where the Queen in question is possessed or ...something. There's a build up of tension, conflict (both mostly played out in spooky organ music) then a climax and some sort of resolution.. "Ode To The Silken Men" gets all "Battle of Evermore," before the organs take over with a weird ascension vibe. Then the silken men sound like they are supposed to be marching in all "Wizard of Oz," style. I'll give credit where it's due for trying to do something different but this type of rock opera is a bit ambitious for a first album and, especially taken out of context, some of the songs are just weird and irritating. My knee-jerk reaction was to say that it sucks but, ultimately, it's an interesting record that goes overboard with experimentation. I'm sure it sounds brilliant on acid.
Fresh Blueberry Pancake - Heavy (1970)
Speaking of curiosities this Pittsburgh band pressed only 54 copies of their LP, making it highly sought after by folks who really should find other things to do with their lives. It was released by a German label so the rest of us could see what the fuss was about.
So ... here's the scoop. At some point in music history, after garage bands banged out simple three chord "Louie Louie," style stuff, then guitars and equipment got better and louder and you have the heavily distorted 60's lead guitar sound, wringing each note for all it's worth. At some point in the 70's it seems everybody and their dog had a Les Paul and a Marshall (or a Sunn if they were really cool) and a distortion box and could rip pretty decent, fast blues leads a la Jimmy Page. Also, since so many variables effect guitar tones and because sometimes the planets just align a certain way and a shitty, budget set up just sounds like God, there are a wealth of good raunchy guitar licks on old-dusty albums like this. So the first track, "Hassles" and the tune "Clown on a Rope" have some nice nasty guitars, the rest is a bunch of hippie bullshit like "Country Joe and the Fish," meets jazz influenced light rock. Then you're just left with this guy's annoying, braying donkey voice on the nauseating piano ballads like "I Call Him Lord." A straight up tune about God for fuck's sake . Fuck you fuck you fuck you, you fuck! I officially pronounce this album - "not heavy".
San Francisco's Shiver (1972)
Real raw, grimy, heavy 70's rock which actually wasn't released in the 70's. It sat around somewhere, until being unearthed and released on CD by Shadok's Music. It sounds like it this album  was recorded live, or at least live off the floor, with copious amounts of microphone feedback. Swirling, spacey guitars and also brings the sludge. You can almost hear flares rippling in the wind. Nasty shrieked vocals sound like the bastard child of Janis Joplin and Sam Kinison caught in a lawnmower and in case you're confused by this, it sounds fucking great.These are shirtless, pot dealing, shop-class kids who are about 35 by the time they graduate. Matthew McConoughey's character in Dazed and Confused was in this band. Grab your eagle-feather roach clip, put your headphones on and look at yer black light posters. 
Black Widow - Sacrifice (1970)
Here's another new arrival, straight from What-The-Fuck Land. Satanic prog rock from the 70's.
The closest comparisons I can draw musically are some of the odder King Crimson folky bits mixed with  "Goblin,"the band that soundtracks all the Dario Argento horror movies, and  a bit of Herbie Hancock thrown in. The singer sounds to me like he must be wearing a ruffled shift and/or cape without any trace of irony
It's bizarre to hear a band attempting play very dark music with lyrics about satanic rituals, using jazz flute and Hammond organ. Imagine trying to invoke Satan on a clarinet. Obviously (duh) it is the greatest thing I have ever heardThe closer, "Sacrifice," is my pick for best track on the album. 
11 minutes of elevator doom jazz to die for.

Cactus is a band that will ultimately be remembered more for what they were supposed to be than for what they actually were. Tim Bogert and Carmine Appice, the rhythm section of Vanilla Fudge, was going to be joined by Jeff Beck and Rod Stewart but then Beck fell off his bike and Rod Stewart had to go get his stomach pumped.
Jim McCarty, formerly of Mitch Ryder & The Detroit Wheels ended up playing guitar instead. Rusty Day, formerly of The Amboy Dukes became their singer.
They were cursed with the label of "super group," early on and also billed (by whom, I have no idea) as the American Led Zeppelin. They failed to match Zep's popularity and are noted primarily as being unsuccessful.
Cactus were a hardcore blues/boogie rock outfit who put out a few albums from 1970 onward and then fizzled out only to be forgotten, then thawed out and re-discovered 30 some odd years later.
Now their relative unknown status just makes them that much cooler. Regardless of time, place or context, they are a smokin' tight band. Jim McCarty's leads absolutely rip, Rusty Day sings his fuckin' balls off and Bogert and Appice bring the heavy bottom end, so essential to a groove based band.
Jim McCarty

Rusty Day was later replaced on vocals by Peter French from Atomic Rooster and Leaf Hound and McCarty by Werner Fritzschings on guitar but by this time it was already over.
Keyboardist Duane Hitchings also joined. He is notable for putting a band called "Son of Cactus," together featuring himself and no original members of the band.
Rusty Day was tragically machine gunned to death along with his eleven year old son as a result of a bad cocaine deal in 1982. RIP.
 
Rusty Day

Cactus (1970) The first album starts with the most blazing version of "Parchman Fram," I've ever heard, and bear in mind it was also covered by Blue Cheer the previous year. McCarty absolutely stands on his head on this one. The album order is a bit strange as they slow it down for the next two Lady from South of Detroit is not one of my faves, while "Bro Bill," is country blues and reminds me a bit of "The Band," (or "Cripple Creek," which is as far as I go with them) but with good lyrics. Howlin' Wolf's "You Can't Judge A Book By The Cover," features some bad-ass harmonica by Mr. Day. "Let Me Swim," kicks the energy level back up to begin side 2, Then "No Need To Worry," is slow traditional blues. "Oleo," breaks from blues rock with a Bogert bass solo that becomes so distorted and rad (I'm talkin' Cliff Burton style) that it's fucking retarded. Ends with another ripping rock tune "Feel So Good," which gives Appice his drum solo at the end, where it actually seems to fit and doesn't totally piss me off. At that point it feels like he's earned it. A good debut with 2 smokin' covers, unfortunately, the better original tunes are pushed way back to side 2. This is still  a classic slab or rock 'n' roll that you need. Oh, and by the way, the cactus on the cover sort of looks like a ... oh, never mind.
One Way ... Or Another(1972)
What these guys do to old standards has to be heard to be believed. The way they rip into "Long Tall Sally,"  absolutely destroys. This is prototypical heavy blues rock. "Rockout, Whatever You Feel Like," and "Rock n Roll Children," drift into Foghat territory with some of the backing vocals and you get the feeling they're reaching for a single but it doesn't quite make it and just ends up slowing the pace down too much. Bad Mother Boogie 1&2 feature more bad-ass harmonica from Mr. Day and more straight up blues, before plugging in and kicking some ass.
"Feel So Bad," Opens side 2, on a strong note, then the mellow but awesome instro "Song for Aries," and the smokin' "Hometown Bust," and the explosive title track. "One Way ... Or Another" is one of, if not the best tune these guys ever did. One of the best examples of the genre period. If someone were to me, what do you like about this type of music, I wouldn't say anything, I'd just put the song "One Way ... Or Another," by Cactus on the stereo. Quote me
This begs the question - "why not put it up first," before "Long Tall Sally," or at least second. Why bury it at the end? You could play the album backwards and the sequence would be better. Buh-reeeew-tul!
Still, even better than their debut for my money. and heavy blues rock at it's raddest.
Restrictions (1971)
The decent title tune, kicks the album off on a good note, "Token Choken," and "Alaska," are both goofy throw-away numbers. "Guiltless Glider," stretches way to long and is simply not a good fit this early on the album. Their cover of Howlin' Wolf's "Evil," is one of their all-time best recordings and was released as a single.
"Bag Drag," is another poor choice to be buried all the way on side 2. If you can get past the odd title, it will kick your ass. Fuckin' raw tune.  Lyrics are about the Vietnam war "What a drag, livin' in a plastic bag etc." Rusty Day just howls. What an amazing song. It wasn't released as a single ... or even a B side. Career sabotage? you be the judge. The mellow "Mean Night in Cleveland," is a perfect closer. Despite having more tracks than the previous two records, "Restrictions," has fewer highlights. Still, another good record hampered by poor sequencing.
*
(A quick note about sequencing);
The first two Cactus albums start with a high-energy cover tunes, "Restrictions," starts with the decent title track. Immediately they all change direction. 
Song 2 could possibly be the weakest tracks on each record; 
"My Girl From South of Detroit," "Rock Out Whatever You Feel like,"and "Token Choken" are not typical of the band's sound and lousy choices for such a prime spot on a record.
These are followed up by "Bro Bill," "Rock n Roll Children," and "Guiltless Glider," respectively.
"Glider" is too long and is out of place so early on. The other two just aren't strong enough to be placed so far up front, especially since they are already preceded by a weak track.
It seems like the band (or some record company bozo) didn't have the confidence to put their most heavy, rockin', original material on side 1, and then, for some reason, put their hokiest crap in the 2nd and 3rd spot every time! I'm sure this caused some to stop listening when things went steadily downhill after their energetic opening tunes.
As a casual listener, I was really mostly aware of their covers of "Parchman", "Evil," and "One Way... Or Another," and wasn't as familiar with some of their best original material, which is mind-blowing. Who says sequencing doesn't matter?
'Ot N Sweaty (1972)
Their last official release is a bit of a grab bag. The first side is recorded live in Puerto Rico, the second half in the studio. Duane Hitching's keyboards are prominent, and that's a strike against, because I think keys suck, but whatever.  Boogie woogie? Meh.
So Rusty Day was out at this point but ... I can't tell. They seem to have cloned him. Leaf Hound's Peter French is the singer on this album but the live side 1 and "Bad Stuff," the first of the studio tracks sound like Rusty Day to me. McCarty's replacement is more noticeably different. Possibly because because the songs have a mellower, country twang to them, which I am choosing to blame, again, on the dreaded piano.
The studio material is pretty standard fare for either Cactus or Leaf Hound (it's not super distinguishable at this point. Noticeably less raw but a better album than it had any right to be. Decent but not essential.